“Oh give thanks to the Lord, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever!”
I was going through my journals a few months ago & came across this poem I wrote when I was 17 years old. It caught my eye because, unlike my husband, I NEVER write poems. I can’t rhyme worth a lick! (Let’s just say that the poetry section sophomore year in my English class was the t-o-u-g-h-e-s-t part of English during my entire education. I can rhyme “cat, bat, sat, mat” but that’s about it.) Nevertheless, I must have had a lot of emotion running through me that night.
April 29, 2005
“Praying, hoping, waiting
for one to open his eyes
and see her
the invisible one
who no one dares to
“Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord”
See, I didn’t date anyone until Jeff, when I was 22. Throughout high school and college I had really hard seasons when I thought I couldn’t wait one moment longer. I never got asked out on a date. I had friends, great friends, but no one that pursued me. Looking back now, I’m so thankful for how God orchestrated my dating life. However during it, I definitely had moments of despair.
But I’m hear to tell you that our God is F-A-I-T-H-F-U-L.
He sees you.
He knows you.
He is present.
And He is at work in your life, working all things together in His perfect plan.
Psalm 107:1 says “Oh give thanks to the Lord, for He is good, for His steadfast love endures forever!” Then it goes on to say “Let the redeemed of the Lord say so”. I am here to “say so!” His love does endure forever; His love never ends.
I was brought to tears when I read this journal entry because exactly 7 years later, on April 29, 2012 Jeff asked me to marry him, if he could love and serve me for the rest of my life. God gave him the “nod”, as my dad always said, and Jeff pursued me. I wrote in my journal the day after,
April 30, 2012
“Lord, you know my heart and all the years I’ve longed to be married, all the hours I’ve spent praying for my future husband- You’ve seen me. You know me. You walk with me. And now it’s in the light- known. You’ve blessed Jeff in my life, and in Your beautiful and perfect way You’ve brought us together. You’ve written our love story and it’s absolutely beautiful. God, I feel like You made Jeff for me- when You created him, You had me in mind.”
It is so good to wait on the Lord.
For His timing.
He writes the best love stories.
So rest in Him. He’s got it. Let him write your story, in His time, in His way. It’ll be way beyond your wildest dreams.
BUT. BELOVED. There is even GREATER news than resting in the love story He may have for you one day.
He’s already written the greatest love story of all. And you’re apart of it.
He chose you. He came for you. He wants you. He died on the cross, rose again, so He could have you, and marry you. He is our true Husband.
Isaiah 54:5 AMP
“For your Maker is your Husband—the Lord of hosts is His name—and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; the God of the whole earth He is called.”
If you’re in Christ, you already have the greatest and most beautiful, and fulfilling, love story, EVER.
Run to your Savior- your Husband. And rejoice in His great, and never ending love, for YOU.
Our relationship with Jesus is forever. As wonderful as marriage is, it’s only a glimpse of our eternal relationship with our Savior.
Can you relate to my poem? What is God teaching you in your waiting? How has God shown you that He is indeed faithful?
Why is the truth that God is our Husband such good news?
Here is the book that helped me the most in these times
Awesome! That’s really an amazing story! And it’s just what I needed to hear! Thank you for being brave enough to share this! Such a blessing!
I can relate to your poem in many ways. Being 23 years old and only having 1 “real” boyfriend– I feel anxious and impatient, waiting for my future husband. The one boyfriend I have had left me with no confidence or hope in men. Within out relationship, he was both emotionally and physically abusive and was unfaithful, among many other things. Once I finally ended the relationship I kept thinking, “Why me? What did I do to deserve such turmoil?” It took a long time to figure it out, but I genuinely believed that although I went through that relationship, God kept a close eye on me, making sure that I knew when it was time to get out. He turned the switch in my head that said, “Leave. Now.” And I have never looked back. That was over 2 years ago and I have put myself back together and although I still am waiting for my future husband — I know that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel, and He will be there, with His plan, with open arms.
Stephanie ! I can relate to everything you are saying. At an early age I sought relationships with young men rather than Jesus. My last relationships 2 years ago left me mentally scarred. I have absolutely no hope in men again. But after reading this article written by Alyssa I feel a sense of hope. I see someone that went through the same emotions as I am right now and I see light at the end of the tunnel. I see that today, Jesus sent his messenger to deliver hope to the ones that are losing it. Last night I dreamt that I met a guy but in the dream I lost all my self control and focused only on him and I actually saw my education life begin to fade away. When I awoke from the dream I thanked God, because it showed me that… in this point of my life, I can not control those aspects of my life and I must wait on his will and his grace. Anyway, may God reign his blessings upon each and everyone’s life.
Thank you so much for writing this, it gives me so much encouragement to read it. I’m 20 and I’ve never dated and sometimes I wonder if I ever will, but this reminds me that God has a plan far greater than anything else.
Alyssa, Thank you so much for everything you share! This just brought my best friend and I to tears. We have been struggling with this so much lately and can relate to your story in the most amazing way ever! Not only did you give us hope but you reminded us of the Husband we have! God has been using your blog in more ways in my life than I can express to you and, praise God, it is making me shout from the rooftop lol praying for you, that you continue to stay encouraged in Christ and I know you will in turn continue to encourage us, your fellow sisters!
Your posts are absolutely beautiful. Your love story with Jeff is amazing and the marriage that the Lord has blessed the two of you with has also blessed so many lives, lives of people you don’t even know! Your posts enlighten our day and provide so much understanding. I can DEFINITELY relate to your poem. I have even used the word “invisible” to describe myself. I have had boyfriends in the past, but nothing “special”. I am now saving myself for him, the one whom God has me in mind for. I feel that God is teaching me to be confident in my waiting. Romans 8:25 “But if we wait for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently and confidently.” Also that my husband will be my best friend, not my source of completion. My husband was made to complement me as I him, Christ came to complete me. Thanks so much Alyssa! God bless you and your family. 🙂
Alyssa, you are such an encouragement! I am an 18 year old first year college student who has made the commitment of waiting to date. It has always been a really big struggle for me to see God as my husband and to run to him rather than to guys; little by little, that battle is being won! Thank-you so much for your honesty and openness!
I would suggest the books “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” and “Boy Meets Girl” both by Joshua Harris. They seriously helped me in “waiting to date.” I went from relationship-hopping to finally being with one, godly man whom I intend to marry (:
I highly suggest the book “I kissed dating goodbye” by Joshua Harris as well. It TRANSFORMED my outlook on dating and here I am, a 23 going on 24 young woman waiting on my FAITHFUL God, to come through IN HIS TIME!
I believe that when we are strategic about our dating it works out best for ourselves, for what God has called us into and even the best for our future husbands. I love what Alyssa’s husband Jeff says “Dating with no intent to marry is like going to the grocery store with no money. You either leave unhappy or take something that isn’t yours”
Wait… and Wait on the Faithful One
Your comments “God, I feel like You made Jeff for me- when You created him, You had me in mind.” made me think of “When God Made You”, by Natalie Grant. A wonderful song that my husband and I chose for our wedding song. We truely believed that God had lead us down the paths we followed and brought us together.
It is amazing how impatient we are in the waiting game. When we ask we want it now, we don’t want to have to wait for His timing. Although when you think about how long eternity is the few or even several years we have to wait for Him to guide us and for us to follow His plan is just a blink, a wrinkle in time as we know it.
Oh my goodness. That hit right on my heart. Wow. It brought me I years reading this, it’s an amazing story. Thank you so much. I’m 23, same spot you described, exactly to the point. Still waiting on God’s timing. It’s encouraging to know someone else understands, some of my dear friends don’t quite, but that’s okay. Thank you.
Alyssa, I am SO encouraged by this post. Thank you for opening up and sharing to us the moments in your life when you were in despair. I am 18, and I have never had a boyfriend! There are so many times in my life where I question God and his plan for my life! I wonder why he hasn’t sent someone to me, when all of my other friends are in purposeful relationships. Then, through his word, He reminds me that He is SOVEREIGN, and FAITHFUL! He loves me so much, and has someone special that was created for me that He will send to me in His perfect timing! Sometimes I get discouraged, but I need to remember who God is. He wants the best for me, because he love me.
Thank you for your honesty today, Alyssa! I was blessed! Praising God for you!
I love this. Thank you for sharing. Thank you!
I literally always have these thoughts running through my head like “maybe I’m not good enough” or “I’m forever alone.” but I realize after reading your post, God has a plan for me and this, like everything else in life, should just be left in His hands.
God bless you!
I can identify COMPLETELY with this post! I am 23 and have NEVER dated..I always knew at a young age that God wanted more for me than just dating around..I cling very tight to the scripture in Proverbs where it says: He that finds a wife finds a GOOD thing AND obtains favor from the Lord…even though its hard, and difficult to be the age that I am and seeing friends that are younger than me getting married and having children..I still continue to put my trust and hope in God knowing that He is faithful and wants to give us the desires of our hearts! I am for now just going tocontinue to lean on Jesus!!
Thank-you for this blog post… it’s exactly what I needed! I’m 17 years-old, and I pray all the time for my future-husband and I sometimes wonder if it is paying off, but I know it is! When I want to become upset about it I trust that God knows my future, and how can I worry when the Lord holds my future! So for that I’m very thankful!… I love your blog by the way its my favorite blog! thank-you for letting the Lord use you, and being sensitive to him!
It’s great that you pray for your future husband. You have no idea how much he needs it. God bless.
This is wonderful. I have been dating the most amazing man that God has brought into my life four wonderful years. When we first started dating, I wondered if he was the right choice for me and if it was just a temporary person in my life. I had gotten out of a relationship several months before him, and I had lost all faith in men. I had prayed for a man to come into my life whom God had created just for me. I didn’t expect him to be in my life so quickly and I always wondered if he was really meant for me. So many reasons have led me to believe that this man, this wonderful, Christian man, was brought into my life at just the right time. God gives us the people who are in our lives at the right time.
This is so true! I wouldn’t have lead this if i hadn’t been looking at your husbands page. You really show how God has a plan. It was very good and encouraging to read
You can’t imagine how much those lines has helped my life. At this moment I was feeling like you almost in despair all my friends are having boyfriends, taking dates but have never known nothing of that (I had never been kissed I’m 19) sometimes I feel like I may have aproblem maybe is my apparence or my character or maybe guys from church feel ashamed because my father is the pastor.
I don’t know lately I tried to chance but nothing happens,
Now I understand that I have to give the Lord the control of all areas of my live.
I’m a junior in college and here there is such an incredible pressure to have a boyfriend and get married. SO.MUCH.PRESSURE. I know God has something incredible planned for my life, and for my fellow sisters (and brothers) in Christ, but it can get so insanely difficult to be “alone”. I’ve dated in the past and I miss the feeling. Sometimes I struggle with feeling almost worthless, like I’m not worth a guy “pursuing” me. But every time I feel like that God shows me another way He loves me and another way He is caring for me. It may not be for a while but I’m slowly learning to trust God more fully and to give Him everything, even the deepest desires of my heart (even though He knows them already). Reading your story and that poem hits home. It is EXACTLY what I needed to hear and yet another sign from our Father that He is the only one who can love us completely and fully. Thank you, Alyssa, for having the desire to share this with us. It was perfect timing =)
You could not have said this better. Thank you for this! Even for us guys this is surprisingly a huge struggle. I’m a 21-year-old, third-year college student who has tried to win the hearts of multiple really nice girl “friends” of mine in both high school and in these past few years of college In the end, none of them ever had any interest in dating me. I’m still “that guy” who has never dated a girl in his life, as hard as he’s tried. But maybe that is the problem… I must be trying way too hard… if that even makes sense. Maybe it’s time I play the waiting game for once instead of chasing every time.
I was so encouraged by your post. I have been struggling in that same spot. I am 21, and I have never dated. Im also a senior in a small christian university where it feels like every person is in a relationship or getting engaged. Anxiety has taken over and I feel rushed into finding the person I will spend the rest of my life with. All my friends are unknowningly pressuring me into pursuing guys. It is the biggest challenge for me because I dont think that way, I want to be pursued.
Thankyou so much for this. I can definitely relate to this as a 22 year old single, being one of few singles withing my group of friends. I definitely feel Gods teaching me patience and prompting me to trust his timing. More importantly I feel he wants me to pursue and know him in more deeper ways than I do now. To build on my relationship with him, one that brings contentment in my lifeknowing he is all i need, whether in a relationship or not.
Again Thankyou for your insight and willingness to share.:)
This is my story. I am almost 19 years old and I have never dated for me to hear this is such an encouragement to me! This week I started a journal to my husband knowing one say God will introduce me to the rest of my love story!
God knew i needed to read this today! i am turning 28 in a couple of weeks and really struggling with being content in my current life situation. especially when people i went to high school with are either getting married or having child #2 or even #3! thank you so much for this reminder that God has something beautiful and amazing planned for me. I just have to be still and let Him work.
Speaking of perfect timing, you wrote this at exactly the perfect time. Here I am, a college freshman, reading all the ridiculous tweets about people “needing a cuddle buddy” or “I have the best boyfriend eveeerrrr.” As much as tweets and statuses like that annoy me, it’s sometimes hard not to feel that when that’s what the world displays as the status quo. You just reminded me of why I haven’t dated yet and why I will continue to wait for the right man to treat me like the daughter of God I am. I can’t wait to love that man in return and to have a relationship like the one you and Jeff share. Thank you for everything.
Thank you, Alyssa for this post. It hit me right in the heart, right where I needed it. I am 35(yes, that’s right, 35) and I’ve never dated. I made the commitment many, many years ago to wait for the one God brings to me. It’s so hard and I’m about ready to give up. I am starting to think that I’m not marriage material. It’s a very difficult thing to deal/wrestle with but this post encourages me to hang on.
Alyssa thank you soooo much for this post!! We have the same story except I haven’t found my Jeff yet! This was super encouraging and I’m giving up all my stress to The Lord.
Beautifully said! It’s so amazing to look back and see how God was orchestrating everything the whole time. I admire you for waiting patiently and prayerfully upon the Lord. You are a beautiful wife and woman of God sweet Alyssa! xo
I thought I was the only one going through this! I am 20 yrs old and have never dated anyone. I always say to myself that God has someone special for me but the older I get I feel like there is no hope in ever finding the one person for me. Your poem really spoke to me. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you so much Alyssa for this. I can so relate. I am at that point where I am learning that I do have the most wonderful husband in the world and he has his own timing for everything. I have a not so happy past and just recently starting to move forward with life and wondering where my life is supposed be going and wondering if I will ever have that special person to share life’s moments with and this just reminds me to stay patient and keep my faith strong because he has already written my love story and I am exactly where he wants me to be right now. Thanks Again!
Thank you, Alyssa!! The man I thought was the “one” that God intended me to spend the rest of my life with and I broke off our relationship of 6.5 months. He is a Godly man and loves me completely, I just don’t love him that way. It doesn’t matter what one’s age is when this happens it is still very sad! I was married many years ago and have been single longer than you are old, this was even more reason that I believed this was the man I would spend the rest of my life with. Even though I feel sadness I am at peace and know this is the Lord’s willl for me. I face tomorrow in the knowledge of Jerimiah 29:11. I also realize there will still be tears, thank you for sharing!
Wow! Thank you so much! I am 19 years, never dated or been asked out. Recently, it’s been doing a lot to my self- esteem, walking on my college campus seeing couples or guys giving girls big bear hugs, I always wonder when is it my turn! This is so encouraging! From the bottom of my heart, thank you so very much! God bless! <3
Thank you for allowing yourself to be vulnerable so that other can be encouraged and blessed. We never really know the extent of what God can accomplish through our willingness to serve Him even when we feel vulnerable. The words that you wrote were beautiful and exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you for posting the verse! There is so much power in the scriptures! Blessings!
Thank you so much for writing this and reminding me that it is important to wait well and trust in God. I find it really difficult being single when all my friends are finding their husband. I needed to hear this to remind me that it will happen in God’s timing. 🙂
At first I was thinking ” aw again someone telling me to wait” … but your post really touched me….Trusting God in this area has been tough for me , few months ago he told me to leave the man I thought was the one. I didn’t quite understood why at first, but then I knew God had a better plan for me… So i am just rejoicing in him and waiting for him . Only He knows.
I’m in agreement about your words bringing tears. I have been in a relationship for the last 2yrs with a man that I know is not right for me. He is emotionally abusive, & I never feel loved. Your husband had a facebook post not too long ago that mentioned something about if you looking at the man you are with & being able to say you would be happy if your son turned out like him. I would not be. However, I do have a son. He’s 16 & he just wanted so much to have a man in his life. The guy I’m with has NEVER been there for him, for anything. I needed to hear this, I needed the reminder that God has a plan for me regardless of who or where I am at in my life. I forgive him for treating me wrong, & I forgive myself for allowing him to. I can move on now, your words opened that door. Thank you:)
Thank you for this post! It was beautiful. I have been praying for my future husband and waiting on the Lord. It can be so tough to just wait for his timing and the man he has in store especially in college. This post was such an encouragement and an answer to prayers. I have been asking for strength and after reading this it just lifted my spirits. It just shows that God really does care and hear our prayers and that he is faithful through all things.
I cannot thank you enough for posting this. I have been struggling with this for so long; I’m 20 and have never had a boyfriend. I’ve talked/been involved with a couple guys, but they weren’t the right ones for me, and they both left me with despair in the thought of ever finding the right guy. I try so hard not to think about it, but as any girl in my situation, it’s tough! Especially when having friends engaged/married already so young, friends who have long-term boyfriends, etc. But this just reminds me that it’s all in God’s hands, it always has been. I just need to have faith and know that His timing will be perfect, and that He is writing me the perfect love story. That poem really hit home, and this post made me feel better. Thank you so much, God bless 🙂
Thanks for giving us a glimpse inside your heart! This is so encouraging for us single gals. I’m a lot older than you but don’t want to be alone forever. We all want our prince charming 🙂 But who better to wait on than the King of kings? Waiting on the Lord <3 P.S.~Congrats to you and Jeff!!!
Wow, you seriously posted this at the perfect time, and I really needed to read it.
I am 21 and never dated anyone. I have always felt very alone and weird because of it. I just don’t understand. I’ve asked, “what’s wrong with me? why doesn’t anyone want me?”, been very frustrated with God for not putting a guy in my life thus far, and seriously felt like I couldn’t wait anymore. But I know He’s really planning everything out better than I ever could. This really encouraged me. Thank you.
Wow the way you talk about how your life was before you met Jeff is almost exactly where I’m at. It’s so hard, because I don’t want to be sad or dissatisfied or lonely..but sometimes you just don’t know how not to be. It’s encouraging to see someone who is able to relate to me…Sometimes I look at the fact that I do have guy friends (and one of them is one of my closest friends) and then i wonder what’s wrong with me that they don’t pursue me?? I know the Lord’s got this, it’s just hard sometimes…I have confidence in whatever He has planned, He can see high and above what I can, and He knows what awesome plans He’s got for my life…I just have to trust that. *sigh* I wish it was easier sometimes! Thanks so much!
I can completely relate to how you felt at 17. I too have never dated, never been asked out, never had anyone pursue me. And I’m 21, almost 22, years old. Many of my friends are either dating or already married. In high school it wasn’t as difficult telling people that I still had never had a boyfriend. But now as I get closer to “marrying age,” it’s a little more awkward when the dating subject comes up. I have never been ashamed of my lack of dating experience because my whole life I’ve felt as though it was completely purposeful and what God wants for my life. I can honestly say that most of the time God has kept my heart from feeling desperately lonely for my man (sometimes its more difficult when yet another friend gets engaged) but I feel fully prepared to wait for the man God has made more me. The waiting can be hard, but I know it’ll be worth it 🙂 thanks for your post, Alyssa!
I completely agree. I didn’t date until my husband. Sadly, he left years ago after being unfaithful. I know God is faithful to redeem what has been done and I am waiting on Him to bring that person into my life. As a single mom, it is difficult to wait. I passed up several opportunities to date because of their choices and habits or the manner that they asked was more like I was in jr high. If there is not the courage to ask me out in person or over the phone and it’s done in a note through a friend, definitely not the man for me. Many people have tried to get me to do online dating and my response is always, “God is big enough to bring him into my circle if that is who he has for me. I do not need to go searching. That would be like creating my own Ishmael and not waiting on God’s promise. God brought Rebekah to the well, He will bring my future husband into my life too.”
It has been almost 7 yrs alone. It is difficult, but I will not settle for anything less than God’s best.
I’m a guy, and you’re speaking from gal’s point of view, but this was still a blessing to read. It was definitely a source of reassurance and encouragement. Thank you for sharing.
Alyssa, let me start by saying how much I loved both of your poems. Your poem as a 17 year-old reflects how I also felt in high school while waiting for the right one. Like you I never dated in high school, and at times I felt desperate and lonely. I also know what’s it’s like to jump into a relationship without first praying about it only to find myself unhappy and in so much pain. But when we take time to seek God and place Him before all else, it is SO amazing to see how perfect His ways can be. Three years ago I met the man who would later become my husband. I cannot begin to explain how beautiful God is and how perfect are His ways!!! Everything aligns so beautifully and He truly gives you all the desires of your heart! I know he did for me. But it is a learning process. Once we learn to love God we are ready to love others in His perfect way. I pray that continues to use you and be of example to others.
This is so encouraging! Thank you for sharing your wisdom with me. I am 16 and sometimes wonder why I’ve only briefly been in relationships. God has the perfect guy waiting for me, and sometimes it’s hard to remember that, but knowing I’m not the only one is comforting. Thank you and God Bless!
Oh my goodness…This was the most amazing thing to read right now…and it couldn’t have been more perfectly timed! My best friend of 10 years just got a boyfriend…and so it’s hard not to feel hopeless and forever alone…. I’m 17 (also ironic), and have never had a boyfriend or my first kiss, being the last in my friend group. It starts to make me wonder, what’s wrong with me? But I know those are the enemy’s words of doubt, not mine. Thank you thank you thank you more than you could know for sharing this and giving me what I needed-hope! Because of this, I feel like I’m better able to refocus my life and live for my already Husband…and a pure life for my earthly husband:) Whoever sees this, it would be awesome if you could please pray for me to know God’s will and be able to see who the one is for me. Thanks again. (PS tell your husband to keep posting links to your blogs…that’s how I found it! God’s so cool like that)
Lauren, I’m 17 too and am in a similar boat. Just so you know you’re not alone! I trust that God has my best interests in mind, even if that means never being married. Once I’ve learned to release that to God, life is so much easier to live. There is so much great stuff that you can enjoy while your single. So enjoy it:)
Honestly, I’m half way in tears right now. Where you were 7 years ago is where I feel I am today. It’s wonderful and reassuring knowing that someone who was where I am came out of it with a happy ending. Such a beautiful reminder that waiting on God is always ALWAYS worth it. Thank you.
Alyssa, your words couldn’t have come at a more perfect time. I’m 20 years old and recently ended my first and only relationship. I thought he was the one, the guy God planned for me to have. Everything felt so right, until he stopped caring. I was heartbroken, but I know it was the best thing for me because I deserve better. God helped me see that 🙂 <3
Thank you so much for sharing! Brought tears to my eyes. I am 29, single, and have gone through several relationships, until finally, God stepped in, grabbed my heart, and told me to wait and focus on him. It has changed my life. I have watched Jeff’s videos, the first was Sexual Healing, from a link of someone’s on fb. And now here I am being lead to your encouraging words. So thank you and thank God for putting you in my path. I love reading the messages you are putting on display for hurting, healing, yet broken hearts. Thank you thank thank you!!
A year ago last week I was planning on walking down the aisle to marry who I thought was my husband. It didn’t happen and he is now married to another girl. As hurtful as that was God has taught me so much. I was a new believer and was about to marry a man who has proved himself not to be a follower of Christ. I think everyday about the amazing protection God has placed on my life. This last year and a half (we broke up in may 2011) has been a season of trials and healing but God has drawn me so close during this time. I’m so thankful. I have just recently(like this week lol) walked into a new season of life. Contentment. I’m not saying I don’t have lonley thoughts. And I would love a husband if God wills. But I’m ok. I’m actually happy to have this time to grow in Christ and serve others. It’s amazing what God can do! I posted this so other girls can see it is possible to be single and yet happy about it. Enjoy this time. Get close to your savior! 🙂
Thanks for posting! It brought tears to my eyes. I am a 32 year old single Christian who has only been on a few dates. I’ve prayed & waited for a LONG time and I know God has not forgotten about me but sometimes I need a reminder. And the verse you quoted, Psalm 27:14 I actually just read a few weeks ago & it gave me peace. I will continue to pray & wait on the Lord because his timing & plans for me are perfect! 🙂
Amanda, it’s great to read a comment from someone who’s about my age! 🙂 I’m 31 and I’m from Prague, Czech Republic. I’ve never had a boyfriend, never even been on a date… and I live in a country that has less than 1% of Evangelical Christians. Talk about feeling hopeless some days! To find a solid Christian guy my age in this land would almost equal a miracle. I know however, that God can do anything. He provided a wife for Adam when a woman was literally nowhere to be found! 😉 I have a deep desire to be married and I pray for a husband, but even though a marriage is a good thing and God created it to bless us, we live in a broken world and that sometimes means we won’t get to take advantage of some of God’s good gifts. I don’t know if I’ll ever be married, but I long for God to use my life for His glory whatever my marital status and I pray that I would be deeply satisfied in Him and Him alone. As John Piper says: “God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him.”
Thank you for this post. It is exactly what I needed to read this evening. God has amazing things planned!
wow this is beautiful… I can relate and I do believe that the most important relationship one could have is a relationship with the Lord. He was there from the very beginning and he was beside me all along. I may of been blind to his existence when I was so caught up with myself and my significant other, but I’m so grateful to have my heart broken. It made me realize that my heart was never really broken and it was alive all along. My heart was alive in the Lord once I recognized that he was by my side through it all, I was just blinded to see until life’s experiences allowed me to encounter him on another level. A level that I’m so thankful to be on. Knowing God loving yourself and putting him first above all is the greatest sincere relationship anyone can have. Not only that but I know for a fact he will never leave 🙂
I dated a boy in high school and thought our relationship was centered around God. As the years went on we grew closer to each other instead of God. He became the Lord of my life and I didn’t realize it. When he broke up with me I was crushed and beaten down so low that the only one that could pick me back up was God. Now I’m in college and it’s hard for me to not constantly want the love and attention of a man because I’m so used to having it. Knowing that God has someone for me that will love me but love Him even more is fascinating and exciting! But in the meantime, I want to take time to grow closer to God. Then, when my future husband reads Proverbs 31, I will be the one who comes to mind.
I can relate to this so much.. like yea i’ve had boyfriends before, like it was sense less to me. i’ve been single for a while now and havent found anyone that has caught my eye.. i know God has someone for me, and it may not be the time for me, but im kinda tired of waiting for my “prince charming”
everything you wrote is so inspiring.. keep writing the way you do and i will more than likely read everything you write. i just want to thank you for sharing this with us! 🙂
God reallly does make everything beautiful in His time.
I just found your blog, and I wasn’t really sure what to expect, but I can’t believe how accurately you described me.
I’m 17, and I’ve never been asked out on a date, or anything related to it. I get really discouraged when I see girls my age or younger in a relationship, and it bothers me that it bothers me! Y’know? Sometimes I feel so hopeless or ugly, because I feel like guys aren’t attracted to me.
Anyway, your post really encouraged me to stay faithful in praying and asking for guidance from my Father. I want to be consistent in praying for my future husband too!
But, whether he’s got a special guy for me or not, you’re right. I’m an important role in one of the best love stories ever written.
Thanks so much, Alyssa. God bless you xoxo
I can relate to this, but in a different way than the girls who were never asked out. I was in many, many failed relationships before I was saved, and even had a baby in high school. Sometimes, even currently being with the man that I believe God wants me to marry, I feel like my story is too imperfect to be what God wants. I feel completely inadequate and undeserving of any man being in my life, even though I want to be married. I want a man who loves and cares for me to be with me forever. Even my current relationship is imperfect, and sometimes I’m afraid that God will take it away. We haven’t been pure in our actions, intentions, and thoughts, and our intimacy far outweighs our level of commitment. I have had these things pointed out to me, and sometimes I just want to start the whole thing over, because I don’t know how to make it right when I’m already in the middle of it. Going back to a time before this was broken would be so much easier than fixing what I broke…
Wow! Thanks for the encouragement! So timely for me. 🙂
I, too, was guided to this post from your husband’s post on FB. I find it so amazing how God shows us the truth and guides us even when we’re totally oblivious. I have been struggling the last couple days with being single. I had this plan in my head to be married by 23, kids by 24 or 25 etc. All perfectly planned out in my head. As I pass those ages by it gets harder and harder knowing I’m still alone. Seeing this today was a relief… it was a reminder that it’s not on my terms and the man I am to be with is still being shaped and formed by God and He will make it worth the wait.
This definitely made me shed a few tears. But relationships like yours and men like the man you married give me hope and faith to keep trusting in God. You two are such an inspiration.
This is precious and beautiful. I can relate on the waiting game. I’ve been pursued by other guys but they aren’t godly (usually), and so I don’t accept dates from them. But sometimes it gets tiring wondering about that godly man you may “someday” marry. There is so much hope and truth in your words and His. Thank you for writing them. Bless you, girl!
Thanks for this. I’m also 22 and while I’ve been asked out a few times, it’s never been quality guys who serve the Lord. Like, at all. I decided when I was young I didn’t want to date until I was done high school. That was great and all…
But 4 years later I have a strong desire for marriage and I’m kind of wondering here and there what I’m doing wrong… God has made everything in my life so beautiful in his planning and I can see so much of it, except in this area. I’m tempted to think he believes I’ve been blessed enough and doesn’t care about this area of my life. This helped remind me that this is a lie from the Enemy to get me to not lean on the Lord and encourage me to continually trust in God and acknowledge all the areas of my life he’s working… the ones I can see, and the ones I can’t.
wow , your words have tough me in such a way . im in love with the way you express yourself in words. thank you for sharing!
This post was extremely encouraging to me at this point in my life. Definitely what I needed to hear! Thank you so much for this.
As I read your first poem, the one you wrote when you were 17, it gives me hope. As a high-school girl myself, I can relate. It was like I was reading my own thoughts. Your story gives me a beautiful reminder of the great things that await. I will continue to be patient and remember that “He makes everything beautiful in its time” I will be still and know that He hold my future in His hands. I will wait. I will pray. I will be full of joy knowing that He is preparing him. Thank you for your refreshing reminder and encouraging vulnerability, Alyssa.
Thank you for sharing! I needed this reminder! I am still waiting for the man that God has for me, but I know he is out there and that at just the right time, God will bring us together! It’s an amazing thought and I am comforted by the fact that God loves me so much and has already picked someone out for me! 🙂
Thank you so much for sharing this!! I’m 20 years old and I’ve never had a boyfriend, and I think it’s so hard. I long for the day when someone will pursue me and we can end up having a lasting, loving marriage created by God. It’s hard to wait, but reading this refreshes the truth I know to be true that the relationship between God and me is the most important, and will always be the greatest love story. Thank you!!
“God, I feel like You made Jeff for me- when You created him, You had me in mind.”
That made me cry. Thank you for this post Alyssa !
Thank YOU Lord for give us hope 🙂
Thank you for sharing this! I am in the exact same situation i just turned 22 and I am constantly discouraged and impatient but you faith in the Lord has give me great encouragement! God Bless you! <3
I’m 28. I’ve never had a boyfriend. At times it feels like I’m desperately seeking. I’ve wanted to have the blessing of marriage since I can remember. I know I thought I was ready before.. in my early 20’s but having grown so much more in my faith in the last several years I sometimes laugh knowing how NOT ready I really was! I know God has someone for me, and he’s preparing him right now to be ready as well. I pray it’s soon.. but I”m also trying to use this season of life to be fruitful. It’s not easy for me often – feels like everyone around me is married with kids.. i feel so behind sometimes. I know that Christ completes me and that no man on earth will.. but I long for that season to begin – for that challenge to start. I’m ready. and waiting 🙂
Alyssa, thank you so much for writing this at the age of 20 with not really ever having a boyfriend. And having my friends and family keep telling me that i need a boyfriend and am getting too old without one this encouraged me because it showed me that God is there and he is the only one that matters. It also helps to hear part of what you have struggled with to know that it isnt just me but that someone else out there struggles with the same stuff.
Wow… I couldn’t have said it any better, :'(.. God is writing my Love story though sometimes… It feels as if he’s forgotten about me, but his will, will prevail!!!
Thank. You. We share the same story, except I still wait; and man, did I need someone who has been there too to declare the truth of God’s faithfulness!
Thanks for testifying for Him. I’m encouraged.
Been blessed to have read this. Amazing how God works in us!
A well written article. Thanks for making life harder for men by encouraging the inconvenient idea that women can just wait for men. How about preparing your heart for your future (probably immature) future husband? Or going places where there will be new faces. If you don’t swim, the men can’t fish you….
I am trying to tell my 13 year old son to wait on the Lord for his bride and not to date. It is the ONE thing I wish I knew at his age. Great message here from Alyssa which I wholeheartedly agree with but could I just suggest that in my humble opinion after having found my perfect bride when I was 46 (married once to the wrong person previously) that you need to still be out-there. God anoints us when we step out, whatever the challenge we are facing. So wait for the Lord for sure to find you the perfect person but also make lots of friends, male and female while waiting! Join clubs, societies, volunteer, go dancing whatever it is but try and embrace the joys of being single because as Solomon said there is a time for everything.
Thank you so much Alyssa, I feel really encouraged by your story and I believe that God is very faithful and that when we trust Him for something, he will never let us down. Our focus should not be on finding the right one but our focus should be on Him and in due time He will bring the right one. All we need to do is wait and trust Him in our waiting.
Thank you Alyssa. This has been on my heart recently (my closest friends are all engaged or married) and there are just times when I can’t help but feel down on myself. I don’t know why I’m always so quick to forget all of the ways that God pursues me and fights for my heart. This was a perfect reminder to just trust and rejoice in God’s love.
Thats amazing! A very touching story too.. Glad to know I’m not the only one that writes to God in a journal.
but thanks for sharing this 🙂 xoxo
hey alyssa I have a question, i pray for my husband, but there are times that, I dont pray, and I dont pray for my husband. Im a girl, and yes I long to be married, but even if I dont pray for him all the time. Does God still know I want a husband??
this is so awesome !!! I will always keep up with your posts, they always renew my faith 😀
As soon as I began reading, my heart was in perfect peace. I am also 22 – and God has been speaking this message to me the past week (in reality, about the past 2 months) in a specific battle of settling for someone less than what God planned for me and what God has planned for the guy on my mind. He specifically reminds me to wait on Him, the very verse you wrote – my sister gave to me this week!! *(God’s confirmation!) A lesson He began about 3 years back and I had no idea how far He would go to continuously pursue my heart, so that I would fully understand. I’ve always been so breath-taken at God’s beautiful love for me and I’ve loved Him for a long time. As He speaks this once again – I’m assured that everything is so intricately planned. He’s written upon my heart His story and that will last long after a marriage. I’m truly blessed and grateful fall in love with my Savior – the best Husband and Friend one could dream of.
My friend Brigitte sent me this blog today. It was exactly what I needed to read in this very moment. I was almost brought to tears because of the parallels that compare to my situation right now. Thank you for your words. And I thank God for always working in my heart, even when I feel so helpless when it comes to dating. I know that God must be my husband, and I just yearn to be closer and closer to Him each day. Thank you. <3
Again, God has spoken to me through other believers! Thank you for this wonderful post; it’s just what I needed to read right now.
Being 27 years old, I’m definitely in that season of life where it seems that everyone around me is getting engaged or married. I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t wonder when God will write my own love story as getting married and being a wife is a desire of my heart. I want that Godly spouse to love like Christ and to pursue to Lord with. Like you said, Alyssa, I wholeheartedly trust that God knows the desires of our hearts and is always faithful. Thank you for this post that I know so many young ladies can relate to! xo.
This brought me to tears! Thank you for the encouragement. Your story is beautiful and just in the one year that I’ve known the Lord, He has certainly showed me that he really does do “exceedingly, abundantly…all that we ask or think.” So cool to see how He worked in your love life. Please keep up with the blogging :). You’re a major inspiration to me!
Thank you for writing this! It was such an encouragement! I was raised in church but never really had a true relationship with Christ because I would pursue relationships that were compromising. I had my heart broken so many times and each time God was there in His everlasting love to forgive me. It got to the point where I finally surrendered myself and let me tell you, it was not easy at first. Jesus has been the greatest comforter though in the dark times when I feel alone and grow impatient when it comes to waiting for my future husband. I’m so glad I finally chose to wait and rely on God’s steadfast love. It gets difficult at times but it’s stories like these that are such an encouragement!
Thank You 🙂
Thank you for sharing from you’re heart and being vulnerable with us all! This story is super encouraging and such a great reminder! I really enjoyed reading it!
Thanks for sharing this. At 35 & still single, it can be challenging when temptation is at my door. I attend a conference for women who seek the Lord, & have been for 3 yrs now, & there’s a woman, one of their speakers, she’s 45 now, & has mentioned still being single every time. I understand her message to trust in Jesus, but her singledom kinda discourages me cuz I start to think, “Dang, will that be me??” I’ve had dudes tell me that I need to lower my standards (cuz I try to live as a citizen of Heaven -no R rated movies, only listen to Christian music, don’t go to bars…) I’m not bragging on myself. I love the Lord & all He’s done for me. I was once an alcoholic drug addict & died, but the Lord brought me back. To love Him any less than to live out His Word doesn’t make sense to me, but all that comes my way are those who don’t know Jesus. I don’t get it, but I remain hopeful cuz I know there’s someone out there that loves Jesus as mush as I do, if not more, and that’s who I’m waiting for. Thank you for your words of encouragement. May your marriage be blessed in abundance! Much love!
I really needed to read this today. It gave me chills and made me cry! I trust fully in God, and believe that he has a plan even though I can’t see it right now, but sometimes the waiting gets rough. I’m around married people all the time and it’s hard not to want what they have. That said, God is writing my love story and I want HIS ending. Not mine.
This post struck a cord. I am in the same boat of being in my sophomore year of college, have never been on a date or had a boyfriend. I have an amazing group of christian girls that are just such a wonderful part of my life and I am very thankful for them. It is hard for me to think sometimes that I am on God’s timing and not my own. That He knows His plans for me and I just need to patient and grow in my relationship with Him.This was very convicting and it makes so much sense. Thank you! 🙂 I love the poem as well, it sums up my thought process quite often.
Wow thank you for your story. It’s is beautifull and exactly what I needed te hear! I am 24 years old and still waiting for mister right. But I believe dat someone special is waiting for me.. I just have te be patience.. (and I am;-))
Kisses from Holland!!
Wow. You’re story is amazing, and I feel exactly what you were feeling at that time. You’re words are a reminder of what I already know so I am so glad I came across your post.
Thanks so much for the encouragement. So glad God lead you to write this because I needed to hear it :))
Thank you for taking the time to write this blog. I can’t believe the words I was reading fit my feelings to a “T.” I’m 25 years old, never dated. I feel still just like you stated you had, in my time waiting I’ve learned how to lean on my savior who will provide what I need. Thank you for your encouraging words, they will help me on those tough days when I think I can’t wait any longer.
As happened with almost all, you brought me to tears too. In fact, there isn’t how a God’s testimony don’t touch someone.
I see how hard is to wait in the Lord and how God works trough it! The Bible bring us lot of different examples about His mercy, truth and specially, reinforce the message:WAIT UPON THE LORD, BE STILL HE IS THE LORD.
But isn’t easy at all! Even having the Holy Spirit! My pray till now is to keep waiting.I’m 23yo and never went in a relationship, always waiting. Sometimes seems this thing won’t happen and my dreams will fall down. But we must gotta memory what bring us hope=His Holy Word and promisses are true and He never fail and He cares us so.
You really have a great testimony of life and I sugest to we(everyone who wrote or read it), to pray each other to God confort our hearts and teachs us to be still, strong in Him. I think what I want as husband,I don’t deserve,but I still asking: a man second His heart that do His will and seek Him in the very first place. So, I wish soon can share bless about what God already did! =)
I want to first thank you Alyssa for sharing your story, but I also am so appreciative for all those who commented and shared their personal stories. I saw that there were many in there 20’s who have dated at all. And I noticed at least one girl who was struggling at the age 17 that felt lonely and discontent.
I am about to turn 17 in a couple weeks, I have never dated or been asked out (except this one guy in middle school who I didn’t even know).
I see my friend who has had 3 boyfriends in the last year or two. And it seems she has guys at her disposal! Though I am great-full that I haven’t dated as my friend has, I guess I remain feeling empty. I wish I had the attention of a guy. And I find myself guilty many a time comparing myself to others. I see other girls with dates and boyfriends and being asked out. Nonetheless I am ultimately thankful that haven’t dated yet. And I am great-full for the whispers of love from my heavenly Father. He encourages me and when I hear His voice He completely full-fills me. Hang on Girls (and Guys) God is faithful! <3
sometimes when I’m in my lala land ,day dreaming about
´´THAT PERFECT PERSON´´………..I think: God make me fall inlove with you. so inlove that I can feel butterflies in my stomach when I hear your name, so inlove that my thoughts, my lala land dreams are only about you, so inlove that just by thinking about you, a smile lits up my face………………and I say to myself: God you be my boyfriend.
Thank you so much Alyssa for this beautiful post. I, like many of these responders, can relate perfectly to you. Seems to be lots of us, but you never really meet anyone willing to share in real life. I’m 17 and have never been kissed or have had a boyfriend. Sometimes I forget, but most of the time it’s a constant struggle as all of my friends are dating. I’ve gotten tired of waiting. I feel like it’s my fault, like I’m doing something wrong. Thanks to your post I saw otherwise. God works in marvelous ways, and this post came at the perfect instance. Loneliness sometimes seems to overcome me and I’ve been so busy lately, but you’ve encouraged me to continue to read the Bible and trust in God. I still don’t understand why I forget that God wants the best for me,and that He hasn’t forgotten me, but I guess that’s why we’re imperfect. Thank you for this blog! I wish you a wonderful life with Jeff. I’ve been seeing his videos since he started and I wish to one day have such wonderful friends as you guys. May God bless you. Thanks 🙂 <3
Alyssa, thank you for this post. I am 17 years old and I have definitely had my fair share of moments of hopelessness and despair. It hit me hard when my “great Christian” father had an affair on my mom. All my hope and confidence in Godly men was lost. Some days, it is still tough, and I feel like giving it all up. Some days, I am almost convinced I will never find someone. But as time goes on, God is healing my heart. He is teaching me to depend on Him, on His love, His timing. I am learning things that I actually need to know BEFORE I start a relationship. God has placed amazing examples of Godly couples, and particularly, Godly men, who have led me to keep holding on. I won’t settle for just another any old somebody, I want exactly WHO God has planned for me and WHEN the timing is right. It is actually pointless to date at an early age, because then you are messing with someone else’s future husband/wife. When you are ready to marry, when you are content with your relationship with Christ, that is when you should date. But anyway, thank you for this post. I needed the reminder. May God continue to use/bless you.
Really needed to read this. Having close friends that are either married or dating can be hard on me. It’s easy for me to remind myself to “Trust in God” without actually putting those words into action. I’m encouraged by the comments that flowed from this entry as well. Stay prayed up ladies and continue to fall deeper in love with Jesus. His ways are perfect and true. <3
Finally, a blog i can relate to. Thanks, Alyssa. I can see how God has blessed you with such an amazing man and it’s wonderful to see you both using your talents for the Lord together =) God bless you both!
Thank you so much for sharing your story. It means so much to me. I know of God’s faithfulness. I know that his timing is perfect. But, sometimes, in the midst of waiting, it’s easy for me to forget. I’m 21. I’ve never been on a date, never been kissed, never even held hand with a boy (unless you count a prayer circle lol). I keep waiting for the man that God has for me, and I know that he is out there. I look forward to the day that I will be able to share my story, as you have. I hope that it is as encouraging as your’s.
Thank you again. God bless you!
Reading your story is incredibly encouraging to me. I’m 20, and I’m trying to trust God with my lovelife and I’ve already prayed that and felt that he confirmed that I won’t date someone until I meet the person I’m going to marry, but since I’m a young adult and it seems like all my friends have at least been asked out on dates, sometimes I feel kind of rejected and undesirable. Reading your story has reminded me that not being pursued by a guy doesn’t mean I’m undesirable, and that God really does have a perfect plan for my lovelife and I need to stay committed to trusting him with it. Thank you for that reminder!
Thank you so much Alyssa. This is so amazing, i can definetely relate to this as i am now 20 years old and have not found my companion. All my friends have their boyfriends and it really is hard sometimes to not wish i could have someone to share my life with. But as you said Gos is our true husband and he walks by our side forever. Gos bless you and Jeff 😀 and once again thank you i really needed this!
Okay you are true, YouTube is finest video sharing web site, because YouTube is a lightly no much streaming time rather than other web pages.
Thanks for posting this! I can totally relate!! I’m 23 years old and never dated or anything for that matter. I have finally come realize that it’s okay, God will send the right man into my life when the time is right. I still wonder ‘when will I get married?’… but I’ve learned to trust in God with all my heart and His timing is perfect.
Thanks again! I’ve really enjoyed all your blogs, God bless!!
What a blessing this post is! You’re words have brought such comfort to me today..I really needed to read this 🙂 Your faith and trust in the Lord’s timing is such a testimony and you have really challenged me to work harder and rest even more in that!
Thank you thank you!
I read this post the other day but didn’t really read it. Today, I re-read it. Unlike many of the girls connecting with this, I have been in relationships. Today actually marked the end of one. I found this again today and it was exactly what I needed to hear. God is still in control. He is still good. He will never leave me.
Thank you so much for reminding me of His faithfulness.
Thank you for the encouregement… i can totally related with your story and many here… as i’m still waiting being 24, some days i struggle and some days i’m confident… Thank to the Lord that know and write all stories… and knowing that HE is faithfull and HE is LOVE, everything is possible and the most important relationship in life is the one we have with Him… can’t wait to find my husband 🙂
I too (like you were in 2005) are waiting for something. I long to be married and find someone who is right for me. I’ve spent years waiting and I still am. I have been on dates and had boyfriends before but I haven’t found anyone that completely fits my mold. I learned that I’m way more valuable than what I have subjected myself to. I have been taught that I need someone who is in the Christian faith and who loves God just as much as I do. I need someone who is better than me and who can will pray for himself as well as for me and with me. I hope I find that one day. It’s taken me years to realize this and I hope I’m getting closer. Like you said it’s also not about the marriage here on earth but the one with our Saviour as well. I’m working on both. I hope my relationship with the Lord is pulling me near to Him as well. Your blog really helped. =]
I read this for the first time a week ago after a friend posted a link to your blog on my facebook page, and this was the latest post. So, naturally, I went for the first post that I saw, and after reading it, I was dumbfounded. Quite in shock, as the night before, I had just had a conversation with my best friend about this exact issue, and how recently it was a fight to deal with. Your post was so inspiring, and just gave me encouragement to keep on. I had one guy one time give me attention, though we never dated, and it made me feel so special until I realized that he didn’t truly desire a relationship with me. Then, there was the guy that I thought God wanted me to date, and I tried to orchestrate it, and it fell flat on it’s face and left me a little burned and wounded. And now here I sit a junior in college, with no prospects in sight. But the morning after I read the post, in my Quiet Time, I felt God affirm everything I had read, and brought me to Isaiah 28:29- how wonderful is the Lord’s plan and wisdom. Thanks for this post and the encouragement it brings!
I can’t thank you enough for this post! I became a true believer this past summer right after I turned 18 at a Young Life camp in New York. Throughout my journey of becoming a Christian and opening my heart to the Lord, I have also had a boyfriend who was also my best friend for about 5 years. We recently broke up and it has really been hard on me! It’s not so much the fact that he’s not my boyfriend anymore, I just feel kind of alone. And i’m dealing with the hardships that our society hurls at me. I’ve been having a hard time letting God be enough for me; letting Him be my true love. Your post really encouraged me. It reminded me who my true love really is and that He IS faithful, and that I never have to worry, He always has my best interest in mind. I discovered some of Jeff’s videos on YouTube this summer and they have all encouraged me so much. I’m thankful that God speaks truth through you both, and I just want you to know that your love for encouraging other believers is GREATLY appreciated.
Thank you so much for sharing this. It brought me to tears. I relate so much to your story because I have been going through the same things. I’ve never been pursued or dated and as a college student I thought it was awful. Yet, this past summer when I was in Uganda God showed me His love for me is enough and as great as it will be to have a husband one day I know that His love is perfect and unfailing and not to mention He has loved me since the very beginning of it all. At times it might be hard, but I always remember God’s love for me and it brings me to tears because it’s the most precious gift of all! I am also so thankful to God who used your story to share with others. God Bless you!
This is so amazing, You have served as a major example. I’ve met Ladies who are still waiting and being faithful to the lord but I’ve been wanting to hear a testimony from someone to whom God sees favor in their eyes and gives the guy the “nod”. thank you for such beautiful words. And to young women who are still waiting we have to remember that God is our husband and we still need to serve him with all we have and have a relationship with the One who chose us to represent Christ body here on Earth 🙂
Thank you so much for sharing. I’m 23 now and kind of in a bad place all over. My relationship with God isn’t how I want it to be, part of me thinks it’s because I’m very impatient when it comes to waiting. In college I’m surrounded by friends who are already engaged, it’s hard not to feel lonely at some times, there is some kind of invisible pressure to just be with someone and it makes me scared that I’ll settle with someone less than godly. Sometimes people make you feel like you’ll never be perfectly happy except with a partner, you always feel like you’re missing on something and it’s taking its toll on me. On the contrary I have other friends who are going through their late twenties without getting married and I can’t help but wonder if I’ll be that person a couple of years later. It’s a scary thought and it’s making my life miserable, I stopped enjoying all the beautiful things God has put in my life for the sake of waiting on this one specific wish. But I don’t want to do that anymore, I want to start trusting His timing, I want to believe He’s forever faithful and He’ll bring the perfect person my way when I’m ready. Your poem touched my heart because I feel the same, invisible. I’ve read all the replies to your post (118 comments! I know!) and it’s such a relief to know that I’m not alone in this. Thank you and God bless you and Jeff.
Alyssa thank you so much for this. Even though I have been following Jeff for a while, I just came upon your blog and it is such a blessing. I have had the opposite of your experience, in that I have dated many people. I did not have the Lord in my life until a year and a half ago, so I had a very rebellious adolescence. But even though I have dated so many, I was always lonely, always searching. I was never
satisfied or fulfilled until I had Jesus. Now I am waiting, wondering what God’s plan for me is, and when the right man will come along. Thank you for helping me keep my patience, and reminding me that I have the truest love of all with God. Thank you for your bravery in sharing this, it helps many. Sending many blessings to you and Jeff, and of course Aslan. Keep it up, you are helping many.
I absolutely love this. Over the past three months, I’ve been walking through the aftermath of an especially painful breakup. These passages are healing, as is the poem. I teared up when I read it because my birthday is April 29th and I’ve been praying all day for some kind of encouragement. Thank you!!!
Thank you for this post. I’ve been struggling with this period of waiting for the last few years of my life. I’m 24, going on 25, and I’ve never had a boyfriend [and still currently single]. It gets discouraging as you get older, knowing that many of the very close friends around you are getting in/or already in serious relationships (especially ones that have God at the center of them). I was brought to tears after reading this. Thank you for the encouragement and reminder of our 1st true love. God is teaching me that as I wait, I am able to pursue my career and stay focused; to continue serving him in the youth ministry I’ve been involved in at my church for the last 4 years, and that He truly has the best timing.
Thank you so much for sharing that, Alyssa. I can relate to your story so much! I will turn 30 in nine days and am still waiting on the Lord. It IS hard – sometimes very hard, but every once in a while when I really need it, He sends encouragement through His word or through others. Today it was you. Again – thank you!
Thanks so much for this blog <3 🙂 It helps me so much <3 && This is exactly what I needed to hear to keep me going tonight. I even started reading the book "Anything" that you read && recomended us to read 🙂 Juss wanted to thank you && let you know your a blessing to me && to alot of others 🙂 <3
You truely are an inspiration 🙂
I think that many have told you so, but what I love about your own experiences are that you don’t come across as perfect, you are a girl just like me. Us girls who fantasize about our wedding day and dream about meeting that special (congats about yours coming true by the way). Your an inspiration because you are a beautiful example of God’s love for his little girl 🙂
This gives the rest of us so much hope to just continue being patient and trusting in God. and keeping ourselves pure for the man God has thought of during our creaction
thanking for sharing your story 🙂 one day I hope to be sharing mine too 😀
As convincing and encouraging as this article is, some things still trouble me. If we all “sit back” and wait for that special someone, and nobody pursues anyone, then who is going to ever find the person they love? If you give up on dating, then how will you get to know about people at a deeper level? I guess the idea of God steering 2 people into each other’s lives doesn’t make sense to me because we make so many decisions for ourselves… But I do believe we are free to pursue godly men, and it’s fun! But I also understand the feeling of wanting to “take a break” from “the game of chase”.
I just watched the Q&A you and your husband did on dating, which I very much enjoyed. I was a little hesitant about clicking on the singleness link but God was telling me to click it so I did. I didn’t know what to expect before I read the blog post but I am sure glad I did. As I read your story I felt as if I was looking in a mirror, all of the feelings and thoughts I’ve had about my singleness were in this post. There have been PLENTY of times when I’ve cried myself to sleep because I thought I wasn’t good enough or pretty enough for anyone. Being 21 and never dated or even looked at in that way is not something everyone can understand. I am truly greatful to God for letting me find your blog and this post. I am now trusting and waiting on the Lord to write my own love story. Thanks for sharing. May God continue to bless you and your husband on your journey together. 🙂