To My Best Friend

ALYSSA JEFF-116

To Jeff,

I so distinctly remember meeting you for the first time. We were at a wedding, you were wearing a bright blue collared shirt and looking so tan. I had butterflies and my palms were sweating at the thought of you coming over to talk to me. After we met, I remember looking at your photos on Facebook for hours- trying to figure out who this “Jeff Bethke” was. I knew there was something special about you. When we started to date, I fell hard and fast. I was over the moon for you. I stumbled over my words, burned food (I mean, I burned a grilled cheese!) tripped on everything—clearly my head was in the clouds. Everything when you start dating is magical (and a little awkward!) The day we got married was one of the best days of my life. (Like seriously—I wish I could relive it again and again!) But never in my wildest dreams did I think it’d be this good. This deep. Yes, marriage is hard. It takes so.much.work. We’ve had our fights and arguments and disagreements. We’ve cried and forgiven and asked for grace. We’ve walked through some trenches already, and I know there’s a lot more to come. But I love being married to you. I would choose you again and again and again. You are my best friend—no one knows me like you. You know my heart—my fears, insecurities, worries, struggles, and my joys, passions and dreams. And you love me still. You fight for me, for us. You are humble and teachable and full of grace.

We’ve already changed since being married- and it’s been so fun to watch you grow more into the man that God has created you to be. You are strong. You are faithful. You are a hard worker and you do things with integrity and honesty. You are incredibly generous and you sincerely care for others. You’re such a fun dad to Kinsley- always making her laugh. You constantly tell her how beautiful and strong she is—how you love her, but God loves her even more.

We certainly have not arrived. There’s so much more to learn and grow in—but I am so thankful to be on this journey with you. You walk with Jesus—and therefore, point me to Jesus. There’s nothing better than when you hold me and pray for me because Lord knows I’m a mess.

There’s a lot we don’t have in common- you are a world traveler who loves adventure and flying by the seat of your pants. You do everything on super speed, and thrive on procrastination. I am a homebody who is a planner. I’m slow on most everything and would die if I procrastinated!

But what we do have in common is Jesus and a mission to love Him and make Him known- and that is the most fun of all.

You make me see things through a new lens, are constantly teaching me of God’s grace and how to live in it, and always make me laugh with your crazy faces and spontaneous dance moves.

It’s only been 2 ½ years of marriage, and 6 ½ years of knowing you (yes I will count those ½!) and it just keeps getting better. I’m so thankful for you Jeff, and am so excited to continue on this journey with you. Thanks for being my best friend. You are such a joy to me.

Love,

Lyss

Friday, March 13, 2015

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34 comments

  1. What a beautiful letter, Alyssa… Thank you for being an example in showing respect, love and appreciation to your husband (as we all should do!) 🙂 God bless you, your family and especially your marriage! Lydia

  2. That truley was beautiful. You both are an inspiration to many young couples!!

  3. You both are so well fit for each other! I pray that God blesses me with my own best friend for life! I wish you many more years of happiness! Oh and enjoy your sweet baby girl!

  4. God bless you two! 🙂

  5. You both inspire me so much. I’m quite a bit older than you are and all my life I’ve wanted a marriage like you have. Full of God, laughter, tears and unconditional love. I’ve jumped into many relationships in my brokenness but trusting I’ve learned through my mistakes and will one day be blessed with a love like yours. May your journey through this life grow in ways beyond what you could ever dream. Thank you for sharing your inspiration and love because it brings people like me a genuine hope on those days when it would be easy to give up. Love and blessings xxx

  6. Alyssa, this is beautiful but you might want to edit your ‘About Me’ section because you haven’t mentioned Kinsley there yet. 😀

  7. This is so beautiful.

    May God bless your relationship + little family.

    Kind regards,

  8. Thank you for sharing this incredibly beautiful sentiment. I read it and about three sentences in started to get misty, and a few more sentences later the tears were rolling. What moved me was more than the love you have for your husband and the story you share. What impacted me even more was the confirmation I received that I can and will eventually experience love like this in my own life.
    This time last year I was dating the guy I thought I was going to marry. Everything was going well as far as we knew, and I had fallen in love so hard and so fast. But over one fight, our first fight, it was all over. After we had both decided we wanted to work towards marriage, everything ended just as quickly. That was more than six months ago and I am still working through the issues and baggage that came from that experience. One thing I have learned is that as hard as it is to walk away from someone you might think is perfect, it is even worse to settle for someone who is not the person God has for you. There are elements of this post that I want in a marriage: emotional availability, security, trust, joy and silliness… And as long as I can remember I’ve wanted my husband to be my very best friend in all the world. The person I was dating before could not offer me that. But reading your story gives me hope that someday someone will. And until then my job is to live my life in obedience to the Lord, allowing Him to grow and mature me for whatever is next.
    Thank you for posting this – it was really helpful for me in the season I’m experiencing!

  9. So honest and wonderful. When i read blogs like this, it reminds me that true love still exist and that the waiting is worth it.
    God bless you both

  10. THIS IS SO CUTE. PRAISE GOD.

  11. This is so beautiful and it did my heart good to read it. Thank you! I cried when you wrote about the differences you each have, and I need realize the man I married is different and yet still the same, but so am I. God bless you!

  12. so beautiful ❤️ it gives me hope to know there’s still true love out there !

  13. I’m an old guy63 yes young and been following Jeff since a young man who I mentor, Ryan Walters introduced me to his videos. What an incredible ministry God has given him, and now to you both. I loved the ficus on godly love in the midst of great differences. That is often how God works as He did in my marriage. Iron sharpens iron all so that we can be confirmed to the image oh His Son. I see you are both on that journey and taking as many with you as God brings to you! May God richly bless you all and keep you close!

  14. Enter your comment here… This is just beautiful! God bless your marriage

  15. Beautifully written Alyssa. Jeff is one blessed man to have you as his wife, and Kinsley as her mother. I love the work you both do for the Lord.

  16. Alyssa, thank you for those words. It only makes me feel stronger and more patient in my waiting for Mr. Right. I pray God will send me an honest man who loves Jesus like Jeff. All I want is a man of God. And I pray God keeps blessing you guys, so you can keep blessing others by sharing the Gospel.

  17. So sweet and honest. Wishing you guys all the best! Thanks for sharing your marriage openly with us!

  18. God has truly blessed Jeff and you with a great mission .Your words hit home to me this morning as I read this. I will be celebrating my 10 yr wedding anniversary this yr and no matter where we are together or apart I still remember the first time I met him. Thanks for sharing.

  19. This is so beautiful. One of my favorite couples. 🙂

  20. This was so beautiful and raw. I think you two are just amazing. I know you have your problems like all marriages, but you truly are role models for marriage. I love seeing the love you both have for God, each other, and Kinsley.

  21. Thank you. For reminding me what a Godly relationship and marriage is again and again and again.

  22. I just celebrated 12 years with my husband on Thursday. It’s hard but it’s good, great even! We’ve watched marriages around us crumble and it is scary. The difference between ours and the ones that have lead to divorce I believe is that we have lived our life together through Christ. We pray for each other and go to Mass together. We are helping our children through their sacraments together and taking a shared role in helping them with their walk. We don’t always agree, but we do easily compromise. Congrats guys on your 2 1/2 years. You are a good example of what a marriage should look like to all of your followers. I love to hear about your journey. Enjoy the ride
    -Kelly

  23. This is over the moon lovely! You are truly blessed!!!!

  24. So sweet! love you two.

  25. To read the love you share is so wonderful. My mother just went home to be with the Lord and your love is exactly the type of love my dad shared with my mother. A love truly sent from heaven and wrapped in the arms of Jesus. My blessing for your lives is that you might share your love for no less than the 70 plus years my parents shared theirs. May you be blessed in all that God has for you to do. Love following you guys on facebook. That baby of yours is the cutest thing. Be blessed!

  26. Beautiful 🙂

  27. What an Inspiration the two of you & your beautiful love is to me! I’ve read (both)of your books and loved and was inspired by both! I hope & pray I am find a love like yours soon, I’ve been lookin and waiting and wishing and hoping and begging God for it for so long. I’m 31 now and am growing weary, pray for me? Loved this blog, you’re love inspires me! XoX

  28. Im so happy for u guys and God loves u guys so much…u r bless alyssa in many ways….Jesus is the right path

  29. This is so wonderful. The world needs more beautiful marriages. I’ve been following your lives for a little over a year and every single time I’m uplifted by you both, and I thank the Lord for knowing a good match when he sees one. Praying for a relationship like this for myself one day! <3

  30. This is truly beautiful. I admire your marriage very much and hope the Lord keeps blessing your family and doing great things through both of you. I pray my marriage is as blessed and strong in the faith as yours is. Thank you for sharing this with us. ❤

  31. Dear Lyss, What a great testament to your husband! And thank you this blog, we sound very similar and I also got to marry my best friend. 🙂 He’s also a man of God who has led me back to Him and that is the ultimate gift of life.. What you have written is exactly how I feel and it reminds me I need to thank my husband more often.

  32. my son just got engaged, I want to share this with him!

  33. Wow, amazing, beautiful. True love does still exist may Jesus bless your marriage and family more and more. You are an inspiration to others.

  34. Boy this makes me cry! So beautiful! Its so important for your spouse to be your best friend too, right? Makes everything so much easier, I guess…

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