When Insecurity Rears Its Ugly Head

insecurityInsecurity. Just the word sends shivers up my spine. Ugh. I hate it. The little bugger doesn’t come up often, but when he does, I want to run away and hide. Lies flood my mind:

Who are you kidding? You can’t do this. You’re nobody. You’re not like them. Nobody sees you. Nobody cares. You’re not good enough. FAIL. See, you’re not as great as you thought. You should just give up. This isn’t going to work.

Deep breathe.

LORD, FLOOD MY HEART WITH YOUR TRUTH! It’s true, I can’t do this—on my own. I don’t really know what I’m doing. But I want to trust you. You have called me to this. You have a purpose for me that you are not going to abandon. This is your adventure for me. And it’s thrilling, exciting—and hard. I am brought to my knees today. I’m just little ol’ me. But I’m YOUR little ol’ me. I belong to you. I have the Holy Spirit dwelling in me. You will lead me through. You will help me. You are my refuge. You are my strength. I need you Lord.

I think the problem with insecurity is that it causes our eyes to be on us.

What do they think of me? I can’t do this. I’m a failure.

But when our focus is on Jesus, insecurity flees.

No longer do we care about what they think of us, but rather we’re fixed on what God thinks of us. The impossible becomes possible because God is with us, he is for us, He fights for us and works in and through us. And the reality is, yes we will fail. But that doesn’t mean we give up. It means we keep going. Every world changer, inventor, creator, artist has failed at some point in their life. But the key is that they kept going. They used their failure as a learning opportunity and were better because of it.

No, insecurity I will not run away and hide. I will look to Jesus and be covered by the shadow of His wings. You can run away. Run far away. I am HIS. And He’s got this. I will keep running, keep obeying, keep trusting. My God reigns and He’s got this.

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3 comments

  1. Hi i was shared this blog from a great friend and came across this as i was going through a hard time, i cant share this with my friends because its not mine to share but as a stranger i can share with you. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years and from the beginning his struggle has been with porn. He started at a you g age and temptation is always there when he met me he wanted to quite and i waited on him for 6 months but its still here. He was free from it for 2 months and messed up lastnight. I do not know what to do because ive given him many chances and my forgiveness is soo much but i cant deal with what comes with it such as insecurity and the lust that will affect our future? Please help a desperate teenager trying to do Gods will

    -audrey

    1. Hi back Audrey,

      difficult topic, but I´d like to give you an advice from my view, I´m a random 20-years-ol guy from Germany, who also struggle with that Porn-Stuff. (Almost for a year!)
      First of all let me tell you: (aaand your friend has the same view, 100%) I HATE IT!! I really wan´t to be a man of God, free from that shame, I don´t know if you ever experienced the state of beeing addicted to sth. or someone?
      Every piece of your body and mind says NO! but you can´t control this, you repeating something you truly hate, I´m tellin´you, this state is soo exhausting!
      But Audrey, you are such an amazing example of a true woman of god, I´m totally moved, you are still true to him! You already showed soo much forgiveness to him (believe me, for an addict,it´s balm for the soul, soo helpful!).
      Plus remember: The pressure is not on you, but on God, because you will never be able to free him from this, only Jesus can, so keep praying for him, he will overcome this, I promise! Do you really think, God let already walked you guys this long journey of suffering for 2 years and will quit this now?? God is faithful and will bless you two, keep on praying and trusting!

      Blessings
      -David

  2. I love how you share little prayers. Often we can get so caught up in soaking up information from people and forget that Jesus is the only one who truly helps us through the hurdles.

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